The Kidnapping Campaign (for Domains)

Posted on May 31, 2007 by Spanky Joe
Filed Under Geekerie, What the? | Leave a Comment

Don’t let your domain be kidnapped. Quick, go see if it already has been (thekidnappingcampaign.com), and if not, make sure to register the reverse of your name!

periodically right, eternally WRONG!

Posted on May 22, 2007 by Propeller Tool
Filed Under What the? | Leave a Comment

Yeah, we could take all your science into consideration and keep revising what we believe, or we could chuck it all out the window and go with simple belief:

Periodic Table of the Elements (Kansas Edition)

Who wants a death star? Dubai wants a death star!

Posted on May 21, 2007 by Spanky Joe
Filed Under What the? | 2 Comments

According to the Office for Metropolitan Architecture, Dubai is building a death star.

Dubai Death Star

I bet the Ewoks are pissed right now for having lost that big real estate contract. But hey, if someone blows it up, I bet the conversation probably would go something like this:

Instant Office Ninja Kit

Posted on April 27, 2007 by Propeller Tool
Filed Under Geekerie, Kit In A Box | 1 Comment

You work at an office, a mild-mannered cog in the machine that is Industry. You keep your head down, cover your ass, and make sure you get your TPS reports in on time.

But does it have to be so? Is there perhaps an alternate path your life can take? More importantly, can you take that path while still collecting your paycheck?

The answer is yes. The answer… is ninja.

“Oh, but not me,” you say. “I could never… could I?” Yes, my timid friend, your time has come. Your Instant Office Ninja Kit is here. The kit consists of the most awesome ninja accessories and tools culled from Think Geek’s stock; all it requires of you is a few clicks and some waiting.

Real Ultimate Power: The Official Ninja BookReal Ultimate Power: The Official Ninja Book

193 pages of pure genius. For example: “Ninjas are mammals. Ninjas fight ALL the time.” Genius. Read it cover to cover, then stand on your head and read it back to front. Then study all the diagrams in detail, practicing as necessary. Then use it to dispatch your first victim. Feels good, doesn’t it.

Killer Coding Ninja Monkeys shirtKiller Coding Ninja Monkeys shirt

You know the moves, but now you have to look the part. And nothing says “ninja” like a shirt that, er… says “ninja”. Really. It’s in fine print, right there at the bottom. Next to “monkeys”, which is just a bonus, really. It satisfies all the ninja requirements. Black? Check. Comfortable? Check. Silent? Check. Badass? Check.

Ninja Attack!Ninja Attack

The only weapon the office ninja really needs. Let pirates have their cannons, their cutlasses, their parrots. The ninja has… tiny ninjas. Four of them, ready to be fired at the slightest provocation. Ready to fight. Ready to fly!

NINJA electronics dusterNINJA electronics duster

If there’s one thing the true ninja knows, it’s how to dispose of the bodies clean up. The office ninja is no different, which is why you need this little can of whoop ass compressed air. Besides, nothing says “instant death!” like a can marked NINJA standing at the ready. Watching. Waiting.

As you will be. But not for long.

Have patience, your ninja kit will arrive soon. And then you. May. FIGHT.

Crappy Cell Phone Customer Service?

Posted on April 23, 2007 by Spanky Joe
Filed Under General Affection | Leave a Comment

Seth Godin consistently get complaints sent to him about cell phone service reps and how poor their service is. Personally, I haven’t had that much of a problem with T-Mobile customer service, but I’ve heard of nightmare calls with reps at Verizon and especially Cingular. Some cell phone providers don’t even know how to do basic math.

Apparently, others think they can hold your wank.

If they actually believed their own commercials, they wouldn’t put out things like this:

Related Links:

iWant

Posted on April 19, 2007 by Propeller Tool
Filed Under Geekerie | 1 Comment

a rack of apples

Donald Trump Toupee vs. Combover Smackdown

Posted on April 14, 2007 by Propeller Tool
Filed Under Smackdown | 1 Comment

So Donald Trump’s hair called. “Guys, I have to know. Am I a terrible toupee or a really bad combover?” At first it seemed that all our hours watching The Apprentice would finally pay off, but on further thought we realized we couldn’t actually tell from memory. We put our crack team of paparazzi photo analysts on the job, and they came up with some fascinating results.

Round 1: Hairpiece

Trump Combover Exhibit A

This photo certainly does give the impression of a dead muskrat perched on The Donald’s scalp. Note the way that it all seems the same color, but that color just doesn’t look right next to the few bits of hair that actually look attached to his head.

Click through to take a closer look. It’s tough to be convinced from this shot alone, though. It’s not like the thing’s flying off as he gets out of the limo.

Round 2: Combover

Trump Combover - Exhibit B

Now this photo tells a story. It’s the story of a few lonely hairs, the last of their kind, pressed into service over an entire head. The story of the long journey each hair takes, starting at the back and travelling all the way to the front, dangling over steely eyes and a mouth that shouts, “YOU’RE FIRED!”

Click on it for the full effect. Pay close attention to the spaces between the strands, those barren areas devoid of life and color. More importantly, would anyone actually make a toupee that looks so fantastically unreal? I think not.

The Winner: Combover

There’s really no contest. As much as we’d like to blame The Donald’s awesome ‘do on the limits of synthetic fibers, it’s obvious that he really is growing it himself. In tiny patches. And spreading it thin.

Why No One Cares

Trump - Exhibit C

In our research, we discovered an interesting effect. It explains a lot about why no one ever seemed to notice or comment on Mr. Trump’s very special haircut. Take a close look at Exhibit C.

If you’ve even continued reading, then I’ll ask you: was there a man in that photo? Did he look a bit like Donald Trump? Did you spend any time looking at his hair? Yeah, exactly. Case closed.

The Payoff

Roll Your Own… Toolbar That Is

Posted on April 14, 2007 by Spanky Joe
Filed Under Geekerie | Leave a Comment

Have you ever thought to yourself,

“Man! I have all these toolbars on my browser! I need more though. I just can’t get enough. In fact, rather than having all these ones that people make for me, I’d rather have my own.

Well, now you can! No really. I did. And if I can do it, any lame-ass can do it. Feel free to download the popularize.net toolbar or even better, go and make your own toolbar.

toolbar

In the age of “even-you-can-be-Time Magazine’s Person Of The Year-you-putz”, creating toolbars has become a notch in the do-it-yourself belt. Now is the time to go crazy building toolbars (how many can you have that all search google for you?).

All I need now is one that makes me waffles and coffee in the morning. Oh wait, that’s right. I have a maid for that. *snap snap* Hop to it Maria! Coffee and toolbars! NOW!

So it goes

Posted on April 12, 2007 by Marsh Mallow
Filed Under General Affection | Leave a Comment

Only cool people know what this post is all about.

TV Shows on Your Mac

Posted on April 11, 2007 by Spanky Joe
Filed Under Geekerie | Leave a Comment

Ever want to watch TV on your Mac?

Well, not if you’re a PC geek. But, if you’re a Mac geek, you may have. And if you don’t already have the Democracy Player, you may want to check this puppy out!

It’s called TVShows (how creative). The thing is, it’s just a torrent downloader that already knows which episodes you’ve already downloaded. It also allows you to specify the quality of download (high, normal, low).

TV Shows

Check it out, if you’re not too busy paying your cable and DVR/Tivo bills.

keep looking »